Bisexuals are men and women who achieve
sexual or erotic attraction to members of both sexes. Usually,
but not always, the bisexual person engages in sexual activity
with partners of both sexes.
Slang terms referring to bisexuals are "AC/DC"
(based on the term used to describe two types of electrical
current), "switch-hitters" (a baseball term describing
a batter who hits from either side of home plate depending
on who's pitching), or people who "swing both ways"
(another baseball phrase, but may also relate to swinging
as sexual behavior).
Little to No Study on Bisexuality
Compared to heterosexuality and homosexuality, very little
scientific study has been conducted on bisexuality. Based
on the studies that have been done, it appears that bisexuals
are not people whose orientation is fundamentally homosexual
but who have some heterosexual sex on the side. Nor are
they people whose orientation is fundamentally heterosexual
but who enjoy homosexual sex on the side.
Also, fundamentally, they are not people
who, at one point in their lives, engage in sexual behavior
with persons of one sex and then, at another point, engage
in sexual behavior with persons of the other sex, although
this pattern of sequential changes is sometimes called transitional
bisexuality. Rather, bisexuals are people who are sexually
attracted to persons of both sexes during the same general
time period in their lives.
It is thought that people develop and experience
bisexuality in a number of different ways. For some it begins
as a form of experimentation that adds a spark to their
sex lives, but it does not become the main arena of sexual
activity. For others it is a deliberate choice to participate
in whatever feels best at the moment.
Criteria Conducive to Bisexuality:
Three particular sets of circumstances have been thought
to be conducive to bisexuality:
Sexual experimentation in a relationship
with a close friend is quite common among women and can
also occur between two male friends or a male homosexual
may develop a sexual relationship from a previously casual
but friendly relationship with a woman.
Group sex is another avenue for bisexual experimentation.
Finally, some people adopt a bisexual philosophy as an outgrowth
of a personal belief system. For instance, some women who
have been active in the women's movement find they are drawn
closer to other women by the experience and translate this
closeness into sexual expression.
Men who are bisexuals are likely to experience homosexual
attraction and engage in homosexual experiences before they
become aware of their bisexuality. For women, on the other
hand, the trend is to experience heterosexuality first.
Although persons with a bisexual orientation
do not fit simply into any one mold, there are a few patterns
that may apply to many bisexuals. Some men and women seem
to alternate their choice of sex partners randomly, depending
on availability and circumstances. Some have committed relationships
in this fashion, seeking a partner of the alternative sex
when the current relationship ends.
Multiple Relationships Not Uncommon
In other cases, a bisexual person may have simultaneous
relationships with a man and a woman. Affairs during a lasting
relationship may also be used to express one's bisexual
orientation. Most often, whichever of these patterns applies,
people with bisexual orientation have a tendency toward
more relationships with one gender than the other.
Researchers who have studied female bisexuality
note that some women who identify themselves as bisexual
say that they have some emotional needs that are best met
by men and others that are best met by women. Some bisexual
men offered this explanation too, but much more often the
male bisexual explains his sexual lifestyle in terms of
a need for variety and creativity.
People usually discover their bisexual orientation
later in life than either heterosexuals or homosexuals.
The majorities of people model the heterosexual lifestyle
and drift into bisexual relationships without consciously
thinking about it initially.
Most people who discover their attraction
to the same sex try to deny their interest and attempt to
fit in with the more socially acceptable heterosexual lifestyle
for a while. Usually by adolescence there is increasing
internal conflict about their sexual preference that may
not be fully resolved until adulthood.
Because it is commonly thought that people
are either heterosexual or homosexual, even by people with
bisexual interests, these people seem to struggle for a
longer period of time trying to conform to one lifestyle
or the other.
It is common for people to be well into
their 20's or 30's before accepting their bisexual orientation.
Society's definitions of what is normal, appropriate, right
and natural have an enormous influence on how bisexual people
feel about their sexual orientation.
Alienation Common Among Bisexuals
Given the negative bias toward bisexuality, it is not unusual
for women and men with a bisexual orientation to feel alienated
from and oppressed by both the heterosexual and homosexual
communities. For them, this can raise serious questions
about their sexual identity. Bisexual people have problems
similar to those that homosexual people have in "coming
out" and making their orientation known to family and
friends
Someone who is bisexual may often find it
harder to start and maintain relationships than people of
heterosexual or homosexual orientation. Because bisexual
people are both different and often misunderstood, those
who do not have a bisexual orientation may be rejecting
or feel that a relationship with a bisexual person could
not be valid or rewarding.
Jealousy, which can be a problem in any
relationship, is particularly likely in a relationship in
which one partner is bisexual. If both partners are bisexual
the possibilities for jealousy may be even greater. The
threat of such widespread competition can be very stressful
to a couple that is not secure in their relationship.
There
is much more to be learned about the nature of bisexuality
and perhaps as bisexual people become more accepted in society,
scientific studies will contribute new information.